Wearing Thin

It is mostly the Holiday that is wearing me down, but add a cold and very little sleep over the Christmas weekend and I begin to have issues. Not like I don't have issue to begin with. LOL! So I'm probably in the same boat as a lot of people. Looking at your bank account after all the shopping and wondering were in the HECK did all your money go! I need to figure out something else for next year. I was truly disgusted after the kids had opened up all their presents and the amount of stuff they got, which I helped to contribute to.
How does someone who grew up a spoiled brat stop the cycle. I guess being aware is first thing. But doesn't every generation always say "I want my kids to have what I didn't..." Which just opens the door for excess. Because that then means you have to give them what you did have and more. If someone came for meager means I can see that more so. But then you run the possibility of going off the deep in.

My kids are so precious and I'm SO THANKFUL they are alive and well after the rough start they had it can be really hard to say no to them and not give them the world. But at the same time I feel like I'm totally missing out and certain things just are not being handled as they should. There is just so much nurturing that the kids need right now as they are getting older and learning things, also NOT learning things because the time is just not there for a lot of this stuff. I felt totally use less when my husband informed me that the girls preschool teacher is going to start working on getting them potty trained. Isn't that suppose to be our job? I would love the help, but have not figured out a way to get the process going while I'm not at home. Especially with hubby. The kids would have an accident before he would remember that it had been awhile since they used the potty. Which is also another problem of mine. I feel I have to do everything because people just don't pay attention to details the way I do. And it will just be more work in the end for me. So just do it myself and that will be less work, yet I don't have the time. I really wish I was the type of person who could function on 4-5 hours of sleep so I had more time in the day.

Oh and on top of all this I feel that I'm screwing up my kids. I started off strong with the rules and consequences for breaking them, but I just don't have the energy anymore to be consistent. Not to mention the fact that I'm also suppose to disclipine the kids for things they do that hubby doesn't want to deal with. AAAAHHHH!!!!!

Things have gotten so out of control and I have no idea how to regain it!